I thought I could keep it clean, this whole change of mentality. But it can not be clean if it's meant to be noticed, people look too short at things that are alright. The only things that bring attention are those that shock. I did not want to kill a kid. A man? Sure, men have their sins. I don't feel guilt over killing those, I would do it again. If it takes one men on this stranded colony to notice the need for change, I will take all of them. Freedom is a double-edged sword, beautiful and cursed. Obtaining those two principles of freedom, that you can do anything but also can be done anything, is how you get free in this zone of the galaxy. You are the master and a slave, a paradox slipping from templates of life. That is freedom.
The fact we can not peak our heads out too much is getting irritating. Hog is not an irritating roommate, but this cave is getting too tight for both of us, especially with the house. It was never meant for two people, I thought of making him live outdoors. It's not cold there, so what's the problem? I don't have the guts to tell him that there is no clean water here, and he's been drinking swamp junk all this time. Doesn't seem to twist him up this much, not more than he already is. The situation is getting tense, we might need to end it up soon. Very soon. May the thing that oversees us watch over me. It's not my time, but maybe it's time for others.
